Service vs. Consumption

I want to share with you a typical conversation I have pretty much on a daily basis:

Sub: I want to serve
Ceara: Ok tribute.
Sub: Can I see you on cam afterward?
Ceara: I thought you wanted to serve.
Sub: I do. But I just want to see you on cam.
Ceara: That's not you serving. That's you buying a service.

Its occurred to me perhaps some of you subs out there could use a reality check on the differences between serving and consuming. Lots of guys contact me saying they want to serve, but almost none of them do. The difference between service and consumption is the same as the difference between customers and slaves. Service is when you do something for me. Consumption is when I do something for you. Customers buy stuff. Slaves tribute. Buying stuff is when you hand over your money with a sense of entitlement. Tributing is when you hand over your money because you're a fucking slave. Get it?

There are two types of guys who can't seem to grasp this;

1. The kind who confuse buying a service with serving
2. The kind who confuse imposing-their-fetish-onto-you with serving

The annoying thing about the guy who confuses buying a service with serving is that it's insulting to presume that the work we do as dommes is actually you doing something for us. Whether its getting on cam, talking to you on the phone, making clips, writing up assignments, or watching you stick a dildo up your butt while you sing Ke$ha songs; we are doing something for you. It's not a service you're doing for us. It's a business transaction. That's why you pay for it.

Now, don't think my point here is to shame anyone for not being a "real slave." I actually prefer customers overall because I enjoy quick and easy interactions with a variety of subs and fetishes. If I'm going to spend the time nurturing a "long term relationship," I'll go fuck my boyfriend. My point here is too many of you don't understand the difference. You think you're entitled to something more than what you paid for because you confuse consumption with service. Buying a cam session doesn't earn you the right to chat with me for free the next day. Buying a few clips doesn't mean I "own" you. You are a customer. Not a slave.

Now, the kind of guy who confuses imposing-their-fetish-onto-you with serving is another animal all together. They are the true "wankers," if you will. The guys who try to provoke a free session. They have many tactics, ranging from playing chicken ("I bet you can't seduce my credit card number out of me.") to challenging your competence ("I thought you were a real domme") to assuming their dick is entertaining in any way ("Let me just show you a picture") to promising to pay later ("My next paycheck is all yours") to offering so-called blackmail information ("Omg, I'm soooo fucked now.") to randomly asking permission for ridiculous things ("Hi we've never talked before. Am I allowed to cum?")

Case in point:

Im sure a lot of you know exactly what you're doing. And for that I hope you burn in hell. But I also think there are some of you who really are just that stupid and get far too caught up in the desire to serve a domme who shares your fetish. After all, if I were a "real domme," I wouldn't be all about the money, right? Well prepare yourself guys, because Buzz Killington is about to make a statement; I don't share any of your fetishes. Not a damn one. If I did. I wouldn't be indulging them for money, I'd be playing with them in my bedroom. To digress for a moment; I don't think it's wise to do what turns you on for money. Not to knock anyone who does, more power to them, but doing sexually gratifying acts for money is not the same as doing it for fun. A shift occurs when your livelihood depends on it; your most likely doing it more often than you want to and negotiating based on the terms of the buyer, not your own. You will eventually burn out and begin to lose what it is you liked about it in the first place. I'm not willing to sacrifice my sexuality for money; I prefer to exploit yours.

Don't get me wrong. I love my job. I love the power, the creativity, the attention, the flexibility and the freedom. But almost all of those elements wouldn't exist if I wasn't getting paid absurd amounts of money for it. So many of you get off on trying to "entertain" me. That's fine, but just know that without money whatever you are doing ceases to be amusing. Watching a guy humiliate himself on cam for profit is hilarious, because I'm getting paid for it; watching him do it for free is just sad.

If I'm losing a lot of potential customers by admitting to this (because your head is too trapped in lala land to understand why men always have to pay for sexual gratification and women never will) so be it. But may I remind you; Im damn good at what I do. Regardless of my incentive to do it.

So do you still want to serve me? Really? Well as far as Im concerned, that can happen one of two ways. You can serve me with money, or without. If you want to (or have to) serve me without tributing, understand that will not earn you my attention. You will never get what others are willing to pay for. Period. But if you truly are selfless, service oriented and broke, you can do the following:

1. Leave high ratings for my clips
2. Write positive reviews for clips
3. Promote me in forums
4. Leave positive comments on my blog
5. Create artistic depictions
6. Report pirated clips
7. etc

If you have money and want to serve, you should still do everything listed above. Just understand that means you must be tributing as well. Listen carefully; a tribute means you are giving me your cash without expecting anything in return. It doesnt mean you won't sometimes be rewarded, it just means you have to lose your sense of entitlement. Which means you cannot "tribute for cam time," or "tribute by purchasing clips." Those are transactions, not acts of devotion.

Serving also means I have to like you. Which is actually a much more difficult hurdle to pass. I generally can't stand most of you for longer than it takes you to blow your wad (which is why I have more customers than slaves.) This is something you probably can't do anything about. We either click or we don't.

And hey, I get it. A lot of you are customers who like to fantasize that your fetishes actually serve me in some way ("I am stroking for you, Mistress" / "I want to suck cock for you, Goddess") That's fine, I know how to play along. Knock yourself out. But only after you've paid (not "tributed") for that kind of session. Don't confuse your desires with my own. I want one thing and one thing only. Until you give me what I want, you will not get what you want.

196 thoughts on “Service vs. Consumption”

Anonymous February 18, 2012 at 7:40 pm

Yep.

I’ve had thousands and thousands of customers and only a handful of truly devoted slaves. I’m fine with this, it makes me a lot of money and I can only handle being Domme to a select few real slaves with whom I keep up an ongoing affair. Like you said, its a relationship and it requires time and effort. I don’t have the time or desire to coddle a relationship with numerous devotees.

I get the, “Can I serve you?”/”I want to serve you.” thing every single day. I always say in return, How do you intend to “serve” me? (In hopes that it will make them realize responding, “By paying you for a cam show” is not a proper response).
Anonymous February 18, 2012 at 7:40 pm

Yep.

I’ve had thousands and thousands of customers and only a handful of truly devoted slaves. I’m fine with this, it makes me a lot of money and I can only handle being Domme to a select few real slaves with whom I keep up an ongoing affair. Like you said, its a relationship and it requires time and effort. I don’t have the time or desire to coddle a relationship with numerous devotees.

I get the, “Can I serve you?”/”I want to serve you.” thing every single day. I always say in return, How do you intend to “serve” me? (In hopes that it will make them realize responding, “By paying you for a cam show” is not a proper response).
slave2vegas February 18, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Total honesty and I love it

I swear You have a way with words once more Princess Ceara! I know I’ve heard You say all of these things to other Dommes before, but to put it all together in no uncertain terms seems like You’ve got a bible for new subs or wankers who have good intentions. I really don’t think it’ll scare off the true subs or slaves, if anything it’s alluring because of the pure honesty, the fact You and friends are so good at what You do, and You never jerk people around. That makes it very REAL. Everytime I hear a Domme mention something about a wanker, it’s hard not to feel that a true Princess shouldn’t have to be exposed to that. And then I realize (despite the obvious motivations of tributing/gifts) how kind it is that You put up with it and don’t let it phase You too much (or so it seems) because it gives more sincere subs a chance to find You and all that’s fabulous about You!
Thank You for writing this.
Slave Jay
slave2vegas February 18, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Total honesty and I love it

I swear You have a way with words once more Princess Ceara! I know I’ve heard You say all of these things to other Dommes before, but to put it all together in no uncertain terms seems like You’ve got a bible for new subs or wankers who have good intentions. I really don’t think it’ll scare off the true subs or slaves, if anything it’s alluring because of the pure honesty, the fact You and friends are so good at what You do, and You never jerk people around. That makes it very REAL. Everytime I hear a Domme mention something about a wanker, it’s hard not to feel that a true Princess shouldn’t have to be exposed to that. And then I realize (despite the obvious motivations of tributing/gifts) how kind it is that You put up with it and don’t let it phase You too much (or so it seems) because it gives more sincere subs a chance to find You and all that’s fabulous about You!
Thank You for writing this.
Slave Jay
Anonymous February 18, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Thing is, I think the financial aspect of domination doesn’t really appeal to a lot of guys, even though it’s portrayed as if it should do in the online domination ‘scene’.

That said, a lot of online dommes, who are really just actresses who don’t know what they’re doing, pretend to share in the sub’s fetish, and it’s unconvincing and doesn’t really work. I prefer it for you to say that you’re exploiting my sexual fetishes for your own financial gain – it seems more honest and is much more of a turn on.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 18, 2012 at 11:53 pm
  
  “Thing is, I think the financial aspect of domination doesn’t really appeal to a lot of guys, even though it’s portrayed as if it should do in the online domination ‘scene’. “
  
  Soooo, they should go find a girlfriend, not a domme. What is your point here exactly? I don’t like the “financial aspect” of pretty much everything I have to pay for.
  1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 1:08 am
    
    A lot of dommes seem to talk about financial domination as if there’s something sexy about paying them. Obviously there has to be a financial aspect otherwise there’d be no incentive for them to do what they do, but for me, handing over the money isn’t what gets me off, it’s knowing that you’re deriving some pleasure from me doing something humiliating. That isn’t to try to defend the kind of guys you’re talking about by the way, messaging you and thinking you’d be impressed by them saying “I just came in your honor”, or whatever, is clearly just being a prick.
    1. scribble February 19, 2012 at 5:55 am
      
      Still missing the point, I think. Since she’s *not* deriving any pleasure from you doing something humiliating. That’s your fantasy & you pay someone for the privilege of it. No? Presumably she derives pleasure from profit (& even there “pleasure” is probably not the right word for it, kind of dressed the transaction up).
      1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 2:37 pm
        
        “Since she’s *not* deriving any pleasure from you doing something humiliating. That’s your fantasy & you pay someone for the privilege of it.” Of course I know that, but the domme has to at least give the illusion that she enjoys it(which Ceara Lynch does, by the way). I think there needs to be a strong element of fantasy in place even before you pay the domme; if subs were thinking as rationally as you suggest they should be, they probably wouldn’t turn to online domination in the first place. Once you’re in ‘sub space’ however, there’s a good chance you’ll pay up.
      2. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 19, 2012 at 4:04 pm
        
        I do enjoy it. That’s not an illusion. I just don’t get off on it sexually, nor would I do it for free (like most people who enjoy their job.)
      3. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 8:43 pm
        
        wise ass wowed and humbly educated
        
        You Princess Ceara are not only
        fully capable of expressing your desires and frustrations
        with us consumers of little cash value
        but also effectively teaching us ways to be of more service
        and use to you
        
        Of course it is a win-win use of truth in a message from a true
        Cerebral Goddess of Beauty, Wisdom and Brains to me (one of us) Her wannabe full-time servants.
        
        It is one of the best pieces of work of its kind and of value to me to study, use and follow, as a poor consumer professing to desire the collar, brand and bowl – and acting as if I want to ride shotgun in the Bentley with Miss Lynch
      4. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 9:40 pm
        
        Princess you extend every effort to illuminate and open the door
        
        Get out of MY World of True Slaves – or play by the rules
        
        CONSUMERS 17%
        Slaves 1%
        Wanking Wasters 42%
        light consumers 40%
        
        light consumer 24% wanking waster 76% of visits
        
        as a light consumer i merit little to no attention
        
        as a wanking waster i merit ZERO attention
        
        Time to move up or get out of the way of those devoted
        btw – I had always thought of myself as Your servant
        my tributes to you are both ancient and small
        
        This great essay of yours has been a real eye-opener
        Thank You,
        I will now put $75 on your SWA account.
        mike
Anonymous February 18, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Thing is, I think the financial aspect of domination doesn’t really appeal to a lot of guys, even though it’s portrayed as if it should do in the online domination ‘scene’.

That said, a lot of online dommes, who are really just actresses who don’t know what they’re doing, pretend to share in the sub’s fetish, and it’s unconvincing and doesn’t really work. I prefer it for you to say that you’re exploiting my sexual fetishes for your own financial gain – it seems more honest and is much more of a turn on.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 18, 2012 at 11:53 pm
  
  “Thing is, I think the financial aspect of domination doesn’t really appeal to a lot of guys, even though it’s portrayed as if it should do in the online domination ‘scene’. “
  
  Soooo, they should go find a girlfriend, not a domme. What is your point here exactly? I don’t like the “financial aspect” of pretty much everything I have to pay for.
  1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 1:08 am
    
    A lot of dommes seem to talk about financial domination as if there’s something sexy about paying them. Obviously there has to be a financial aspect otherwise there’d be no incentive for them to do what they do, but for me, handing over the money isn’t what gets me off, it’s knowing that you’re deriving some pleasure from me doing something humiliating. That isn’t to try to defend the kind of guys you’re talking about by the way, messaging you and thinking you’d be impressed by them saying “I just came in your honor”, or whatever, is clearly just being a prick.
    1. scribble February 19, 2012 at 5:55 am
      
      Still missing the point, I think. Since she’s *not* deriving any pleasure from you doing something humiliating. That’s your fantasy & you pay someone for the privilege of it. No? Presumably she derives pleasure from profit (& even there “pleasure” is probably not the right word for it, kind of dressed the transaction up).
      1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 2:37 pm
        
        “Since she’s *not* deriving any pleasure from you doing something humiliating. That’s your fantasy & you pay someone for the privilege of it.” Of course I know that, but the domme has to at least give the illusion that she enjoys it(which Ceara Lynch does, by the way). I think there needs to be a strong element of fantasy in place even before you pay the domme; if subs were thinking as rationally as you suggest they should be, they probably wouldn’t turn to online domination in the first place. Once you’re in ‘sub space’ however, there’s a good chance you’ll pay up.
      2. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 19, 2012 at 4:04 pm
        
        I do enjoy it. That’s not an illusion. I just don’t get off on it sexually, nor would I do it for free (like most people who enjoy their job.)
      3. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 8:43 pm
        
        wise ass wowed and humbly educated
        
        You Princess Ceara are not only
        fully capable of expressing your desires and frustrations
        with us consumers of little cash value
        but also effectively teaching us ways to be of more service
        and use to you
        
        Of course it is a win-win use of truth in a message from a true
        Cerebral Goddess of Beauty, Wisdom and Brains to me (one of us) Her wannabe full-time servants.
        
        It is one of the best pieces of work of its kind and of value to me to study, use and follow, as a poor consumer professing to desire the collar, brand and bowl – and acting as if I want to ride shotgun in the Bentley with Miss Lynch
      4. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 9:40 pm
        
        Princess you extend every effort to illuminate and open the door
        
        Get out of MY World of True Slaves – or play by the rules
        
        CONSUMERS 17%
        Slaves 1%
        Wanking Wasters 42%
        light consumers 40%
        
        light consumer 24% wanking waster 76% of visits
        
        as a light consumer i merit little to no attention
        
        as a wanking waster i merit ZERO attention
        
        Time to move up or get out of the way of those devoted
        btw – I had always thought of myself as Your servant
        my tributes to you are both ancient and small
        
        This great essay of yours has been a real eye-opener
        Thank You,
        I will now put $75 on your SWA account.
        mike
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 3:16 am

Right on, mostly. haha

Very nice, well-written and thought out article. I really do like how you express it.

I could not agree more with the sentiment expressed regarding boys confusing consumption with service. I see enough Dommes making smartass comments about this type of thing on a regular basis to know this is pretty much the bane of every Domme’s existence. haha

What’s interesting to me is that this phenomenon, if you will, seems to be a unique problem in all sex-related business, not just D/s. As a stripper I and my peers constantly dealt with men trying to impose their desires on us and/or confusing the nature of the “relationship”. So many of them constantly try to make it about the sexual thrill rather than a business transaction.

What I realized is that probably most men have major hangups about “paying for it”, even (or especially) if “it” is just a fantasy. They think they shouldn’t have to pay for it so they often only do so grudgingly and/or try to make it feel more “real” by trying to manipulate the situation to better suit themselves.

As service providers we don’t understand how they can’t seem to understand the situation, but it is my opinion that they generally DO understand, but they just don’t like it and therefore try to change it.

Many resent us for making them pay for it, and in my opinion, this is the cause for most chargebacks. But that’s kind of another issue.

From my experience very few men don’t have any problem paying for the service and just getting on with it. Even though this is old news to me, sometimes I’m STILL astounded at the mental gymnastics some of these guys will go through to try and soothe their lil bruised egos over having to pay for it.

I am sure we ALL wish they could just get over it and view it as a product/service like any other. Somehow the point that no one really enjoys paying for anything doesn’t seem to get through when it comes to sexual service. They just can’t stand that they have to pay for it while we don’t.

I also believe this is probably the root of the whole problem with gender issues in our society, but that’s definitely a whole ‘nother topic.

Lastly, I disagree that doing what turns you on for money is necessarily problematic. I think that depends on how one approaches it and manages limits and boundaries. I also think most of the problems arise with younger people who are less experienced and therefore less equipped to KNOW their own limits, not to mention manage them. But at the end of the day, it’s all about what works for the individual.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 19, 2012 at 4:08 am
  
  Re: Right on, mostly. haha
  
  Wasn’t trying to say it was necessarily anything (although I see how reads that way.) I just meant it would never work for me; I simply could not do something that arouses me at the same same level that I do my job. I do believe some women can make it work and that’s rad. But as you said, it takes experience to create that kind of balance; experience that only comes from making mistakes and dealing with bullshit I’d prefer to just separate and compartmentalize all together.
  
  Also, I do think it’s pretty sad we have to be actually after differentiate between business transactions and sexual thrills, because I do believe it should be about both. Guys wouldn’t have to struggle for the latter (or have to listen to all this bitching) if they just assumed and respected the former.
  1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 4:45 am
    
    Re: Right on, mostly. haha
    
    Agreed creating the balance takes experience that some probably don’t want to or can’t deal with at all – but not necessarily in the business. It can come from simple life experience, if women waited until they were a little older to enter the business. Hence I feel like 18 is generally too young to start, but that’s a whole other topic and not really relevant here.
    
    “Guys wouldn’t have to struggle for the latter (or have to listen to all this bitching) if they just assumed and respected the former.” — YES.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 3:16 am

Right on, mostly. haha

Very nice, well-written and thought out article. I really do like how you express it.

I could not agree more with the sentiment expressed regarding boys confusing consumption with service. I see enough Dommes making smartass comments about this type of thing on a regular basis to know this is pretty much the bane of every Domme’s existence. haha

What’s interesting to me is that this phenomenon, if you will, seems to be a unique problem in all sex-related business, not just D/s. As a stripper I and my peers constantly dealt with men trying to impose their desires on us and/or confusing the nature of the “relationship”. So many of them constantly try to make it about the sexual thrill rather than a business transaction.

What I realized is that probably most men have major hangups about “paying for it”, even (or especially) if “it” is just a fantasy. They think they shouldn’t have to pay for it so they often only do so grudgingly and/or try to make it feel more “real” by trying to manipulate the situation to better suit themselves.

As service providers we don’t understand how they can’t seem to understand the situation, but it is my opinion that they generally DO understand, but they just don’t like it and therefore try to change it.

Many resent us for making them pay for it, and in my opinion, this is the cause for most chargebacks. But that’s kind of another issue.

From my experience very few men don’t have any problem paying for the service and just getting on with it. Even though this is old news to me, sometimes I’m STILL astounded at the mental gymnastics some of these guys will go through to try and soothe their lil bruised egos over having to pay for it.

I am sure we ALL wish they could just get over it and view it as a product/service like any other. Somehow the point that no one really enjoys paying for anything doesn’t seem to get through when it comes to sexual service. They just can’t stand that they have to pay for it while we don’t.

I also believe this is probably the root of the whole problem with gender issues in our society, but that’s definitely a whole ‘nother topic.

Lastly, I disagree that doing what turns you on for money is necessarily problematic. I think that depends on how one approaches it and manages limits and boundaries. I also think most of the problems arise with younger people who are less experienced and therefore less equipped to KNOW their own limits, not to mention manage them. But at the end of the day, it’s all about what works for the individual.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 19, 2012 at 4:08 am
  
  Re: Right on, mostly. haha
  
  Wasn’t trying to say it was necessarily anything (although I see how reads that way.) I just meant it would never work for me; I simply could not do something that arouses me at the same same level that I do my job. I do believe some women can make it work and that’s rad. But as you said, it takes experience to create that kind of balance; experience that only comes from making mistakes and dealing with bullshit I’d prefer to just separate and compartmentalize all together.
  
  Also, I do think it’s pretty sad we have to be actually after differentiate between business transactions and sexual thrills, because I do believe it should be about both. Guys wouldn’t have to struggle for the latter (or have to listen to all this bitching) if they just assumed and respected the former.
  1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 4:45 am
    
    Re: Right on, mostly. haha
    
    Agreed creating the balance takes experience that some probably don’t want to or can’t deal with at all – but not necessarily in the business. It can come from simple life experience, if women waited until they were a little older to enter the business. Hence I feel like 18 is generally too young to start, but that’s a whole other topic and not really relevant here.
    
    “Guys wouldn’t have to struggle for the latter (or have to listen to all this bitching) if they just assumed and respected the former.” — YES.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 3:40 am

Sorry I forgot something

Heh. Where “hopelessmissyaddict” says in the screencap that your response to him was well thought out and accurate, and that it “confirms he’s out of his depth with you” – in my opinion what he’s really saying is “oops you caught me and I see I can’t take advantage of you – I’m going to find someone less astute so I can take advantage of the situation”.

It is my very strong opinion that MUCH of the reason so many guys seek out very young women in ANY sex-related business is because they think the young ones will be less experienced and therefore easier to manipulate into servicing them the way they want. Of course, all too often they are right. Same applies to “dumber” women (or what they think is dumb LOL).

For this reason I’ve always thought the women who can play dumb well have the best advantage, because they can potentially lull the guys into a false sense of being in control then sneak the rug right out from under them. Dumb like a fox, as one woman I admire once said. haha
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 3:40 am

Sorry I forgot something

Heh. Where “hopelessmissyaddict” says in the screencap that your response to him was well thought out and accurate, and that it “confirms he’s out of his depth with you” – in my opinion what he’s really saying is “oops you caught me and I see I can’t take advantage of you – I’m going to find someone less astute so I can take advantage of the situation”.

It is my very strong opinion that MUCH of the reason so many guys seek out very young women in ANY sex-related business is because they think the young ones will be less experienced and therefore easier to manipulate into servicing them the way they want. Of course, all too often they are right. Same applies to “dumber” women (or what they think is dumb LOL).

For this reason I’ve always thought the women who can play dumb well have the best advantage, because they can potentially lull the guys into a false sense of being in control then sneak the rug right out from under them. Dumb like a fox, as one woman I admire once said. haha
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 7:54 am

Samantha Grace

Wow! This article couldn’t be closer to the truth. I always thought I was the only one dealing with the self serving ass wipes? Haha… just because sometimes there are days where I deal with high numbers of self serving emails and cam inquiries. But I guess it is all of us. I also, agree with GCups comments about how guys often twist the service because of their own ego and resentment. I often, feel stripping and pro domming are one in the same thing. I know I’ve received flack from some domme’s for comparing the two. It’s true. We are controlling cock for cash. 🙂

Great article. Loved what you had to say.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 7:54 am

Samantha Grace

Wow! This article couldn’t be closer to the truth. I always thought I was the only one dealing with the self serving ass wipes? Haha… just because sometimes there are days where I deal with high numbers of self serving emails and cam inquiries. But I guess it is all of us. I also, agree with GCups comments about how guys often twist the service because of their own ego and resentment. I often, feel stripping and pro domming are one in the same thing. I know I’ve received flack from some domme’s for comparing the two. It’s true. We are controlling cock for cash. 🙂

Great article. Loved what you had to say.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 7:26 pm

After reading the comment section where you make the distinction about enjoying the work vs. just doing it for the money, I have to say I fully agree. I do genuinely enjoy it but like you, it is not sexual enjoyment per se, and I most likely would not do it were I not getting paid. I am not a 100% Domme. I switch, but I have many subs approach me so over the years I have developed my Domme repertoire more. I don’t give off a strict or “bitchy” kind of tone, so I definitely find I attract the type who think they can take advantage, and I HAVE been duped before I must admit. Live and learn. I see how longer time as a Domme online leads to a more terse, demanding style, and this is happening with me bit by bit.

I was interested by something GcupBitch said about guys being resentful of “paying for it.” I think this is true with guys especially as you move down the continuum in the less sophisticated direction. I have found the guys who treat it as a transaction, pay full price even when there are discounts offered, and free chat me less, if at all, gain much more sway and “power” if you will in the relationship. These are men with money who understand business. Rather than losing my respect as a guy who “pays for it” they gain my respect, and ironically I suppose in the minds of the cheapos, are more likely to be thought of by me as more than just a “customer.” Because I see them as respecting my work and time more they are automatically closer to the same page as me than guys seeking to genuinely turn me on.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 19, 2012 at 10:16 pm
  
  “the distinction about enjoying the work vs. just doing it for the money”
  
  Isn’t it funny how, outside of the adult industry, there really aren’t any jobs where people try to tell you enjoying your work is contingent upon a willingness to do it for free? It’s not so much that were “just doing it for the money,” its that money is what makes it enjoyable. Which to me, really isn’t any different then the fact that having an orgasm is what makes it enjoyable for subs.
  1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 11:20 pm
    
    I had to explain this to someone the other day. With the statement, you work for the post office? Do you do that for the money or for the passion of the system? He replied with, “The money.”
    
    As you can guess this was a guy complaining my session rate as “high”. Once, I explained him working for the post office, is no different then me earning money with pro domming, he shut right up.
    
    I think, this happens because a lot of people have an emotional connection to their sexuality. So, they believe you should also, have the same emotional connection they have for you, to them. I think it is an evil cycle of resent me and emotionally connecting in the wrong ways.
    1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 12:01 am
      
      “I think, this happens because a lot of people have an emotional connection to their sexuality. So, they believe you should also, have the same emotional connection they have for you, to them. “
      
      I agree. I think society really underestimates how emotional men can be when it comes to sex.
  2. stupidmalepig February 19, 2012 at 11:32 pm
    
    Enjoying your work is not contingent upon a willingness to do it for free but if you don’t enjoy it why in the world would you do it? (right right for the money)
    
    I agree I wouldnt do my job for free but I love what I do because I enjoy the work not because I am paid. I need to get paid, because in the real world you gotta pay your bills.
    
    If you truely dont enjoy this, and only do it for the money, then thats a shame. Finding something you love to do AND get paid to do is much more enjoyable.
    1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 12:00 am
      
      You can’t possibly be this retarded… I’ve said repeatedly here that I DO enjoy my job; I even gave a list several reasons why in the main entry. The fact that you need an financial incentive to do the job that you claim to enjoy reiterates my point exactly.
      1. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 12:39 am
        
        First off you said on several occasions you wouldnt be doing it if you were not making money so that is in direct conflict with saying you love it.
        
        I said I do my job because i love it, not because i get paid. I need money to live on so saying I do my job for a financial incentive is a complete falsehold. Thou I will not resort to name calling because of it.
      2. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 12:58 am
        
        do you seriously not recognize the blatant hypocrisy in what you’re saying? Your words;
        
        “I do my job because i love it”
        
        “I wouldnt do my job for free”
        
        So you’re allowed to both love your job and not be willing to do it for free.. But if I’m not willing to do my job for free, its in direct conflict with me saying I love it… riiiight.
      3. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 1:47 am
        
        There is no hypocrisy at all. Read the sentence and not a part of it and what I said at the end.
        
        I love my Job.
        
        I need money to live in the real world. It has nothing with not willing to do it for free,
        
        The best thing you can do is find a job you love and get paid for.
        
        I don’t do my job for money, but you need money to exist in this world. So I found somehting I love to do and get paid for.
        
        I would not do a job solely for money, I would only do a job I enjoy. That’s directly opposite of what you said.
      4. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 2:35 am
        
        I also love my job.
        I also need money to exist in the world
        I also wouldn’t do my job for free.
        My situation is just like yours.
        
        So far, the only evidence you have that I don’t enjoy my work, is that I said I wouldn’t do it if I weren’t making money. That’s the same thing as saying I wouldn’t do my job for free; which is exactly what you said about your job.
      5. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 3:54 am
        
        SO if its JOB JOB JOB why did you even write a post about Clients and Slaves. If it’s your Job then you are seeking clients. You are out here providing a service which you expect to be compensated for. The people who come to you are seeking that service so when they pay you they expect to get something in return.
        
        Why would you even call it a tribute? If it’s a job to you like a lawyer, docter, whater, call it what it is. They don’t call it a tribute. Your conducting a business transaction, nothing more, nothing less.
      6. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 5:43 am
        
        Nice job completely changing the argument. Your questions really demonstrate that you either didn’t read, or completely failed to comprehend this entire blog entry.
        
        To answer your first question, I wrote about clients vs slaves because it’s an incredibly relevant topic in my line of work. Isn’t that obvious?
        
        To answer your second question, I call it a tribute when it is a tribute. Like I stated in big bold letters above, a tribute is when you give money without expecting anything in return. Most of the money I receive isn’t from tributes, it’s from payments for services or products. However, a lot of guys like to call these transactions “tributes” anyway, which is a pet peeve of mine, same with clients who call themselves slaves. Hence, why I wrote this entry correcting them.
        
        Get it?
      7. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 6:48 am
        
        No I don’t get it. You stated “tributing is when you had over your money because your a fucking slave.” I give money to charities and expect nothing in return, doesnt make me a slave. Tributes have absolutely nothing to do with being a slave. Someone has a fetish (giving money to pretty ladies) doesn’t make them a slave.
        
        In the old days they were called Sugar Daddies. Today with the net, and the ability to make money, some smart people combined Slavery and Sugar Daddies and came up with term Financial Domination. Nice marketing tool and great work if you can get it
        
        Curious since you mention how you pretty much ask for it right away and expect “slaves” to freely give it, how is that domination? Domination is imposing one’s will on another.
        
        Oh and tribute was just a word someone came up with to avoid legal hassles of calling it payments/service.
      8. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 4:04 pm
        
        You’ve laid out several different subjective topics; all of which derail from the original one, and none of which I care to argue. This blog was written for the purpose of educating subs on one aspect of this niche femdom scene, as I see it. Whether you agree or not is irrelevant. Considering most dommes share my point of view, it would be wise to take it into consideration if you ever decide you want to interact with one of us in a positive way.
      9. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 9:24 pm
        
        Yes you wrote this to express your point of you and then you had an open comment section one would think so people could respond with THEIR views. If you don’t care to discuss/argue them then don’t.
        
        Whether or not you agree is irrelevant too, but some of us have an open mind and don’t mind hearing the views of others.
        
        Interesting that since I had the nerve to express my own thoughts, which don’t mesh with yours, its seen as a negitive. Funny you called me a retard, question my intelegect and i’m the one coming off as negitive.
        
        I apologize I didn’t realize you wrote this to educate us all, and they you were all seeing and knowing, and no one else dare express their thoughts.
        
        Yes I am sure most FINANCIAL dommes agree with your point of view but P.S. there is a big wide world out there beyond findom that views thinks differently.
      10. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 11:03 pm
        
        There’s a difference between someone who is disagreeing with you, and someone who is dismissing your right to have a different point of view. This comment area has been open to you this whole time. Say whatever you want. I will too.
      11. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 11:48 pm
        
        All I will add was I was not dismissing you from the start. We can agree to disagree.
      12. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 11:57 pm
        
        Duh.
      13. Anonymous February 21, 2012 at 7:20 pm
        
        Of course HER opinion is relevant. HER readers are subs who wish to serve HER. She’s not writing about a “big wide world.” SHE is writing about HER world and how we slaves can be lucky enough to be apart of it. Who is here to serve you? no one. That is why your opinion is irrelevant even though SHE is gracious enough to allow you to express it.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 7:26 pm

After reading the comment section where you make the distinction about enjoying the work vs. just doing it for the money, I have to say I fully agree. I do genuinely enjoy it but like you, it is not sexual enjoyment per se, and I most likely would not do it were I not getting paid. I am not a 100% Domme. I switch, but I have many subs approach me so over the years I have developed my Domme repertoire more. I don’t give off a strict or “bitchy” kind of tone, so I definitely find I attract the type who think they can take advantage, and I HAVE been duped before I must admit. Live and learn. I see how longer time as a Domme online leads to a more terse, demanding style, and this is happening with me bit by bit.

I was interested by something GcupBitch said about guys being resentful of “paying for it.” I think this is true with guys especially as you move down the continuum in the less sophisticated direction. I have found the guys who treat it as a transaction, pay full price even when there are discounts offered, and free chat me less, if at all, gain much more sway and “power” if you will in the relationship. These are men with money who understand business. Rather than losing my respect as a guy who “pays for it” they gain my respect, and ironically I suppose in the minds of the cheapos, are more likely to be thought of by me as more than just a “customer.” Because I see them as respecting my work and time more they are automatically closer to the same page as me than guys seeking to genuinely turn me on.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 19, 2012 at 10:16 pm
  
  “the distinction about enjoying the work vs. just doing it for the money”
  
  Isn’t it funny how, outside of the adult industry, there really aren’t any jobs where people try to tell you enjoying your work is contingent upon a willingness to do it for free? It’s not so much that were “just doing it for the money,” its that money is what makes it enjoyable. Which to me, really isn’t any different then the fact that having an orgasm is what makes it enjoyable for subs.
  1. Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 11:20 pm
    
    I had to explain this to someone the other day. With the statement, you work for the post office? Do you do that for the money or for the passion of the system? He replied with, “The money.”
    
    As you can guess this was a guy complaining my session rate as “high”. Once, I explained him working for the post office, is no different then me earning money with pro domming, he shut right up.
    
    I think, this happens because a lot of people have an emotional connection to their sexuality. So, they believe you should also, have the same emotional connection they have for you, to them. I think it is an evil cycle of resent me and emotionally connecting in the wrong ways.
    1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 12:01 am
      
      “I think, this happens because a lot of people have an emotional connection to their sexuality. So, they believe you should also, have the same emotional connection they have for you, to them. “
      
      I agree. I think society really underestimates how emotional men can be when it comes to sex.
  2. stupidmalepig February 19, 2012 at 11:32 pm
    
    Enjoying your work is not contingent upon a willingness to do it for free but if you don’t enjoy it why in the world would you do it? (right right for the money)
    
    I agree I wouldnt do my job for free but I love what I do because I enjoy the work not because I am paid. I need to get paid, because in the real world you gotta pay your bills.
    
    If you truely dont enjoy this, and only do it for the money, then thats a shame. Finding something you love to do AND get paid to do is much more enjoyable.
    1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 12:00 am
      
      You can’t possibly be this retarded… I’ve said repeatedly here that I DO enjoy my job; I even gave a list several reasons why in the main entry. The fact that you need an financial incentive to do the job that you claim to enjoy reiterates my point exactly.
      1. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 12:39 am
        
        First off you said on several occasions you wouldnt be doing it if you were not making money so that is in direct conflict with saying you love it.
        
        I said I do my job because i love it, not because i get paid. I need money to live on so saying I do my job for a financial incentive is a complete falsehold. Thou I will not resort to name calling because of it.
      2. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 12:58 am
        
        do you seriously not recognize the blatant hypocrisy in what you’re saying? Your words;
        
        “I do my job because i love it”
        
        “I wouldnt do my job for free”
        
        So you’re allowed to both love your job and not be willing to do it for free.. But if I’m not willing to do my job for free, its in direct conflict with me saying I love it… riiiight.
      3. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 1:47 am
        
        There is no hypocrisy at all. Read the sentence and not a part of it and what I said at the end.
        
        I love my Job.
        
        I need money to live in the real world. It has nothing with not willing to do it for free,
        
        The best thing you can do is find a job you love and get paid for.
        
        I don’t do my job for money, but you need money to exist in this world. So I found somehting I love to do and get paid for.
        
        I would not do a job solely for money, I would only do a job I enjoy. That’s directly opposite of what you said.
      4. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 2:35 am
        
        I also love my job.
        I also need money to exist in the world
        I also wouldn’t do my job for free.
        My situation is just like yours.
        
        So far, the only evidence you have that I don’t enjoy my work, is that I said I wouldn’t do it if I weren’t making money. That’s the same thing as saying I wouldn’t do my job for free; which is exactly what you said about your job.
      5. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 3:54 am
        
        SO if its JOB JOB JOB why did you even write a post about Clients and Slaves. If it’s your Job then you are seeking clients. You are out here providing a service which you expect to be compensated for. The people who come to you are seeking that service so when they pay you they expect to get something in return.
        
        Why would you even call it a tribute? If it’s a job to you like a lawyer, docter, whater, call it what it is. They don’t call it a tribute. Your conducting a business transaction, nothing more, nothing less.
      6. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 5:43 am
        
        Nice job completely changing the argument. Your questions really demonstrate that you either didn’t read, or completely failed to comprehend this entire blog entry.
        
        To answer your first question, I wrote about clients vs slaves because it’s an incredibly relevant topic in my line of work. Isn’t that obvious?
        
        To answer your second question, I call it a tribute when it is a tribute. Like I stated in big bold letters above, a tribute is when you give money without expecting anything in return. Most of the money I receive isn’t from tributes, it’s from payments for services or products. However, a lot of guys like to call these transactions “tributes” anyway, which is a pet peeve of mine, same with clients who call themselves slaves. Hence, why I wrote this entry correcting them.
        
        Get it?
      7. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 6:48 am
        
        No I don’t get it. You stated “tributing is when you had over your money because your a fucking slave.” I give money to charities and expect nothing in return, doesnt make me a slave. Tributes have absolutely nothing to do with being a slave. Someone has a fetish (giving money to pretty ladies) doesn’t make them a slave.
        
        In the old days they were called Sugar Daddies. Today with the net, and the ability to make money, some smart people combined Slavery and Sugar Daddies and came up with term Financial Domination. Nice marketing tool and great work if you can get it
        
        Curious since you mention how you pretty much ask for it right away and expect “slaves” to freely give it, how is that domination? Domination is imposing one’s will on another.
        
        Oh and tribute was just a word someone came up with to avoid legal hassles of calling it payments/service.
      8. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 4:04 pm
        
        You’ve laid out several different subjective topics; all of which derail from the original one, and none of which I care to argue. This blog was written for the purpose of educating subs on one aspect of this niche femdom scene, as I see it. Whether you agree or not is irrelevant. Considering most dommes share my point of view, it would be wise to take it into consideration if you ever decide you want to interact with one of us in a positive way.
      9. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 9:24 pm
        
        Yes you wrote this to express your point of you and then you had an open comment section one would think so people could respond with THEIR views. If you don’t care to discuss/argue them then don’t.
        
        Whether or not you agree is irrelevant too, but some of us have an open mind and don’t mind hearing the views of others.
        
        Interesting that since I had the nerve to express my own thoughts, which don’t mesh with yours, its seen as a negitive. Funny you called me a retard, question my intelegect and i’m the one coming off as negitive.
        
        I apologize I didn’t realize you wrote this to educate us all, and they you were all seeing and knowing, and no one else dare express their thoughts.
        
        Yes I am sure most FINANCIAL dommes agree with your point of view but P.S. there is a big wide world out there beyond findom that views thinks differently.
      10. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 11:03 pm
        
        There’s a difference between someone who is disagreeing with you, and someone who is dismissing your right to have a different point of view. This comment area has been open to you this whole time. Say whatever you want. I will too.
      11. stupidmalepig February 20, 2012 at 11:48 pm
        
        All I will add was I was not dismissing you from the start. We can agree to disagree.
      12. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 20, 2012 at 11:57 pm
        
        Duh.
      13. Anonymous February 21, 2012 at 7:20 pm
        
        Of course HER opinion is relevant. HER readers are subs who wish to serve HER. She’s not writing about a “big wide world.” SHE is writing about HER world and how we slaves can be lucky enough to be apart of it. Who is here to serve you? no one. That is why your opinion is irrelevant even though SHE is gracious enough to allow you to express it.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 7:54 pm

A necessary read for all male slaves

Ms Ceara this is a great write and something every male hoping to serve or purchase service from a Domme should read. I retweeted your tweet after getting permission from my owner as I think this resonated with me knowing that many men are confused about the difference. Dommes have an obligation to state up front what they expect and are looking for and in turn, the slave must respect these wishes. When tribute is clearly expected a slave should never waste a Domme’s time or play games. Be honest and if you can’t afford to purchase or tribute then don’t approach. If you have limits financially be honest about them and don’t mislead. And if you truly wish to serve, have a plan in mind and lay it out for the Domme you are approaching letting them know what you hope to do for them in service. Thank you for putting this out there for discussion as I’m sure many men have been guilty of confusing the two without meaning to. The others, the ones who play games and waste time, well they deserve the worst kind of punishment possible…being ignored by beautiful Dommes.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 7:54 pm

A necessary read for all male slaves

Ms Ceara this is a great write and something every male hoping to serve or purchase service from a Domme should read. I retweeted your tweet after getting permission from my owner as I think this resonated with me knowing that many men are confused about the difference. Dommes have an obligation to state up front what they expect and are looking for and in turn, the slave must respect these wishes. When tribute is clearly expected a slave should never waste a Domme’s time or play games. Be honest and if you can’t afford to purchase or tribute then don’t approach. If you have limits financially be honest about them and don’t mislead. And if you truly wish to serve, have a plan in mind and lay it out for the Domme you are approaching letting them know what you hope to do for them in service. Thank you for putting this out there for discussion as I’m sure many men have been guilty of confusing the two without meaning to. The others, the ones who play games and waste time, well they deserve the worst kind of punishment possible…being ignored by beautiful Dommes.
stupidmalepig February 19, 2012 at 9:46 pm

Every slave/sub needs to read the comments section. Nice to see the Domme’s out here admiting their doing it for the money (thou that should have been obvious to anyone with a single brain cell).

If you want to find a real lifestyle domme who is interested in this because they enjoy the kink, power exchange, and the lifestyle in general, then get off your butt, get in your car and spend time at a local fetish club, local bdsm community club and the like.

Anyone on here into financial domination is clearly out her to make money. Nothing wrong with that, glad to see people freely expressing it.
stupidmalepig February 19, 2012 at 9:46 pm

Every slave/sub needs to read the comments section. Nice to see the Domme’s out here admiting their doing it for the money (thou that should have been obvious to anyone with a single brain cell).

If you want to find a real lifestyle domme who is interested in this because they enjoy the kink, power exchange, and the lifestyle in general, then get off your butt, get in your car and spend time at a local fetish club, local bdsm community club and the like.

Anyone on here into financial domination is clearly out her to make money. Nothing wrong with that, glad to see people freely expressing it.
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Well done Goddess Ceara; Your article needs to reviewed by any prospective subs before they even consider contacting You are any Domme for that matter. Service is the key not consumption when dealing with a Lady.

You are Very Good at what You do Goddess Ceara and Thank You for reminding subs what it is all about.
1. Anonymous February 20, 2012 at 11:01 am
  
  is thar Hugh you old butt sniffer
  
  get over here and shine our shoes boy
  
  mork and mindy
  1. Anonymous February 20, 2012 at 5:41 pm
    
    Re: is thar Hugh you old butt sniffer
    
    Yes it is the one sometimes referred to as Hugh; i certainly could be opened to shining your shoes if i really knew who you were.
    1. Anonymous February 21, 2012 at 4:06 pm
      
      Re: is thar Hugh you old butt sniffer – you could be
      
      Open
      actually you are open
      the feel of a word or the sound of a word actually
      my precession with the use of words could be a mechanism made to
      
      LORD IT OVER YOU
      dirty lowdown rival dog
      dyed hair and a tan don’t do that much
      to hide your high hairline Hugh and since we
      each are closer to the end of the ride than the
      Beautiful Young Woman that graciously host us – PCL
      
      I imagine that YOUR party donations are lacking any noted
      SIZE or Frequency, otherwise you might be more more sheltered
      AS IT STANDS you must shine my shoes and GOBBLE my KNOB for PCL
Anonymous February 19, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Well done Goddess Ceara; Your article needs to reviewed by any prospective subs before they even consider contacting You are any Domme for that matter. Service is the key not consumption when dealing with a Lady.

You are Very Good at what You do Goddess Ceara and Thank You for reminding subs what it is all about.
1. Anonymous February 20, 2012 at 11:01 am
  
  is thar Hugh you old butt sniffer
  
  get over here and shine our shoes boy
  
  mork and mindy
  1. Anonymous February 20, 2012 at 5:41 pm
    
    Re: is thar Hugh you old butt sniffer
    
    Yes it is the one sometimes referred to as Hugh; i certainly could be opened to shining your shoes if i really knew who you were.
    1. Anonymous February 21, 2012 at 4:06 pm
      
      Re: is thar Hugh you old butt sniffer – you could be
      
      Open
      actually you are open
      the feel of a word or the sound of a word actually
      my precession with the use of words could be a mechanism made to
      
      LORD IT OVER YOU
      dirty lowdown rival dog
      dyed hair and a tan don’t do that much
      to hide your high hairline Hugh and since we
      each are closer to the end of the ride than the
      Beautiful Young Woman that graciously host us – PCL
      
      I imagine that YOUR party donations are lacking any noted
      SIZE or Frequency, otherwise you might be more more sheltered
      AS IT STANDS you must shine my shoes and GOBBLE my KNOB for PCL
princessdanni_d February 20, 2012 at 5:16 am

I’m not going to ramble on incessantly, but just straight to the point… You hit the nail, on the head.
princessdanni_d February 20, 2012 at 5:16 am

I’m not going to ramble on incessantly, but just straight to the point… You hit the nail, on the head.
Anonymous February 23, 2012 at 4:52 am

You are to your art what Monet was to Impressionism

Dear Princess Ceara,

Thank you for sharing your illuminating thoughts on the subject of online financial domination. The root problem is “topping from the bottom.” Subs (or so-called subs) don’t understand that serving a domme requires the following:

1- Above all the Domme must be a true domme (meaning born with a gift of the skill, attitude, aptitude, and natural inclination to seduce, dominate, control, and drive men crazy with desire) – You certainly are a real domme in the truest sense; you can’t fake that; you are too good; you are perfect, in fact.

2- The sub needs to do what he (some would say “it”) is told without whining, complaining, playing games, etc. In other words, the sub must be truly obedient

3- The sub needs to pay, and pay regularly at a level that he can afford, and at times going beyond that (blowing the budget), and should not except ANYTHING in return, just the honor of having tributed.

4- The sub needs to do extra things that don’t cost money, again not expecting anything in return, not even the slightest scrap of attention, such as writing letters, comments, reviews, voting, promoting, etc., or sending thoughtful gifts.

I think that you deserve both. In other words, the sub should pay for things such as videos or cam time, but then he should also do some real service as well (if that is his inclination). Of course, you are in business, so it’s essential that you are compensated for your time. That is paramount.

Yes, this is a business; however, what you do, Princess Ceara, is beyond just a business. You are an artist. You have elevated online femdom to an art form which no one before had managed to do, and have left a trail of copycat followers and proteges who owe everything to you. Your creativity, your passion, your genius is at such a high level that you transcend the terms “business”, “porn”, etc. It is art, great art, fantastic innovative ground breaking art. You are an artist of the highest order. You are to your art what Monet was to Impressionism. You are the most influential member of your generation in your particular scene which, in fact, you have largely invented, such is your genius.

Thank You for your stupendous contribution.

You deserve true servitude, but unfortunately you do not receive it as much as you should, namely, every single time!
Julian
Anonymous February 23, 2012 at 4:52 am

You are to your art what Monet was to Impressionism

Dear Princess Ceara,

Thank you for sharing your illuminating thoughts on the subject of online financial domination. The root problem is “topping from the bottom.” Subs (or so-called subs) don’t understand that serving a domme requires the following:

1- Above all the Domme must be a true domme (meaning born with a gift of the skill, attitude, aptitude, and natural inclination to seduce, dominate, control, and drive men crazy with desire) – You certainly are a real domme in the truest sense; you can’t fake that; you are too good; you are perfect, in fact.

2- The sub needs to do what he (some would say “it”) is told without whining, complaining, playing games, etc. In other words, the sub must be truly obedient

3- The sub needs to pay, and pay regularly at a level that he can afford, and at times going beyond that (blowing the budget), and should not except ANYTHING in return, just the honor of having tributed.

4- The sub needs to do extra things that don’t cost money, again not expecting anything in return, not even the slightest scrap of attention, such as writing letters, comments, reviews, voting, promoting, etc., or sending thoughtful gifts.

I think that you deserve both. In other words, the sub should pay for things such as videos or cam time, but then he should also do some real service as well (if that is his inclination). Of course, you are in business, so it’s essential that you are compensated for your time. That is paramount.

Yes, this is a business; however, what you do, Princess Ceara, is beyond just a business. You are an artist. You have elevated online femdom to an art form which no one before had managed to do, and have left a trail of copycat followers and proteges who owe everything to you. Your creativity, your passion, your genius is at such a high level that you transcend the terms “business”, “porn”, etc. It is art, great art, fantastic innovative ground breaking art. You are an artist of the highest order. You are to your art what Monet was to Impressionism. You are the most influential member of your generation in your particular scene which, in fact, you have largely invented, such is your genius.

Thank You for your stupendous contribution.

You deserve true servitude, but unfortunately you do not receive it as much as you should, namely, every single time!
Julian
pingback_bot February 24, 2012 at 9:16 am

How to be Owned by and Serve Me Like a True slave

User referenced to your post from How to be Owned by and Serve Me Like a True slave saying: […] If you didn’t read Her blog, go do it now. – Service vs. Consumption by Princess Ceara Lynch […]
pingback_bot February 24, 2012 at 9:16 am

How to be Owned by and Serve Me Like a True slave

User referenced to your post from How to be Owned by and Serve Me Like a True slave saying: […] If you didn’t read Her blog, go do it now. – Service vs. Consumption by Princess Ceara Lynch […]
dominakiara February 24, 2012 at 9:16 am

Inspirational

I love reading your blog, it’s always so insightful! It inspired Me to write up a post of My own – linked your blog at the top so that the losers can read this because it is a really good post, and I reference it quite a bit in My recent blog post as well. I laughed My ASS off at how you totally pegged all the different types of wankers and the games that they play! Don’t agree 100% on all points you listed, but really it’s just a different of opinion, because that’s all blogs are for – spouting Our personal opinions lol. Keep writing and I’ll keep reading!
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 24, 2012 at 8:39 pm
  
  Re: Inspirational
  
  Doesn’t sound like we disagree at all. You said your livelihood doesn’t depend on this. If this is something that you genuinely get off on and the money is simply an added bonus; yahtzee. I was talking about people work in the adult industry as only source of income; if you wanna stay in it for the long haul, its best to exploit other people’s kinks and keep yours to yourself. It won’t necessarily keep you from getting burnt out, but at the very least if you do, you will be burnt out from your job, not your sexuality.
dominakiara February 24, 2012 at 9:16 am

Inspirational

I love reading your blog, it’s always so insightful! It inspired Me to write up a post of My own – linked your blog at the top so that the losers can read this because it is a really good post, and I reference it quite a bit in My recent blog post as well. I laughed My ASS off at how you totally pegged all the different types of wankers and the games that they play! Don’t agree 100% on all points you listed, but really it’s just a different of opinion, because that’s all blogs are for – spouting Our personal opinions lol. Keep writing and I’ll keep reading!
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 24, 2012 at 8:39 pm
  
  Re: Inspirational
  
  Doesn’t sound like we disagree at all. You said your livelihood doesn’t depend on this. If this is something that you genuinely get off on and the money is simply an added bonus; yahtzee. I was talking about people work in the adult industry as only source of income; if you wanna stay in it for the long haul, its best to exploit other people’s kinks and keep yours to yourself. It won’t necessarily keep you from getting burnt out, but at the very least if you do, you will be burnt out from your job, not your sexuality.
Anonymous February 24, 2012 at 8:33 pm

My blog post about You

Hi Princess,

I wrote a blog entry about you in my blog:

http://femdomall.wordpress.com/2012/02/24/princess-ceara-vs-princess-sierra/

and also used a pic of You from your site.

Pl let me know if have any problem with this. I will remove it.
Anonymous February 24, 2012 at 8:33 pm

My blog post about You

Hi Princess,

I wrote a blog entry about you in my blog:

http://femdomall.wordpress.com/2012/02/24/princess-ceara-vs-princess-sierra/

and also used a pic of You from your site.

Pl let me know if have any problem with this. I will remove it.
Anonymous February 26, 2012 at 7:53 pm

You are not a real Domme

This is not just for Ceara, but for all you “high profile” online “Dommes”: if you have never had a session with a sub that did NOT involve money being exchanged, but simply for the enjoyment of actually Dominating them, then you are not a real Domme.
See, it’s very simple. You, “Princess” Lyne, “Princess” Rene, etc., etc… are actually “vanilla” women who offer an Online Fetish Service. It’s a business, pure and simple, and has nothing whatsoever to do with REAL actual BDSM activities. So, if the only way a sub/slave male can be Dominated by you is if he pays for it, then that makes you an Escort Provider who does Roleplays (even if there is no nudity involved it’s still Escorting). As soon as any paid Online/Realtime session is over, you go back to being vanilla. Out of site, out of mind. Your boyfriends are vanilla as well and are not in any way, shape, or form submissive. A Domme that does not make.
i talk to Real Dommes constantly about this, and they all say the same thing: they have their own sources of income that do not involve subs/slaves paying them, they have no need for that. They Dominate subs/slaves because they enjoy it, not to make money off it.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 26, 2012 at 8:44 pm
  
  Re: You are not a real Domme
  
  I agree to an extent; Yes, this is a business. Yes, we are getting paid for online fetish services. Yes, this is a form of sex work. Yes, most of us don’t live the “lifestyle” (although you realize a majority of lifestylers still live a normal vanilla life outside the bedroom, right?)
  
  However, I don’t think that just because money is involved it somehow ceases to be an act of dominance or BDSM. Sex is still sex even if you pay for it. Whether or not were “real dommes,” well, that’s subjective. Personally I don’t care so much about being “real” as I do being “good at.”
2. Anonymous March 3, 2012 at 6:19 pm
  
  Re: You are not a real Domme
  
  As a submissive who has served “real” dommes in person, I have to disagree that women like Princess Ceara, Princess Lyne or the other wonderful online women are not dommes. I serve Goddess Bratty Bunny and am completely devoted to her. I’ve never met her in person, but believe me, she has total control. She controls when I cum, what I think about when I do and when she contacts me with instructions I do them immediately because I am under her control. When you think about it, controlling someone when they’re right there with you is easy. When you can do it from 3000 miles away and without even meeting the person…well now that takes talent!
  1. evilthought2 March 7, 2012 at 4:03 am
    
    Re: You are not a real Domme
    
    No, they are not “real” domme. They are offering online sex service (which happens to be domme/sub fetish) for money. A real domme would be someone who does it in real life, not because they make money out of it, but because they enjoy it. This doesn’t apply to any of theses “dommes”.
    1. Anonymous April 25, 2012 at 6:36 pm
      
      Re: You are not a real Domme
      
      “A real domme would be someone who does it in real life, not because they make money out of it, but because they enjoy it.”
      
      You didn’t read the part about lala land , did you? The percentage of women who actually enjoy guys getting excited by their stinky feet for example, a very widespread fetish amongst submales, is negligible, if not non existent. Same is true for a lot of other popular fetishes.
      Most real life Dommes who are any good at what they do work for money as well. I have to agree with Ceara. If their incentive is money first, like Ceara admits here, but they do a proper job and even “play along” I don’t see the problem.
      Women who do this purely for their own fun don’t exist and the rare exceptions to that rule who do can make that much money they would be crazy to play with broke losers instead.
      Yes women with genuine BDSM feelings exist but this scene and this domme specializes and caters if you wish, no offense intended, in what are strictly male oriented fantasies
      
      Second and not mentioned in this whole real or fake domme discussion is the destructive nature of a lot of the fantasies played out to everyones satisfaction in this scene.
      There’s nothing wrong with dark fantasies or with indulging in them but they’re only fun because they are fantasies. Mist guys don’t want and couldn’t handle a “real domme” period. Those that do probably need mental health care.
      
      You pay a good Domme to create an illusion you enjoy that’s close to your fantasies and whether that’s off or online really doesn’t change much.
      
      Someone who behaves in real life like Ceara Lynch in videos and sessions would be a psychopath. You may think different when you are horny but you really don’t wanna.
    2. cearalynch Post authorMay 16, 2012 at 5:15 pm
      
      Re: You are not a real Domme
      
      Its interesting to me how often the claims people make about sex work so rarely apply to any other line of work. What’s the difference? Why is authenticity contingent upon a willingness to do it for free? If someone is really good at cooking, then decides they want to become a chef, does that person then cease to be a “real” cook?
Anonymous February 26, 2012 at 7:53 pm

You are not a real Domme

This is not just for Ceara, but for all you “high profile” online “Dommes”: if you have never had a session with a sub that did NOT involve money being exchanged, but simply for the enjoyment of actually Dominating them, then you are not a real Domme.
See, it’s very simple. You, “Princess” Lyne, “Princess” Rene, etc., etc… are actually “vanilla” women who offer an Online Fetish Service. It’s a business, pure and simple, and has nothing whatsoever to do with REAL actual BDSM activities. So, if the only way a sub/slave male can be Dominated by you is if he pays for it, then that makes you an Escort Provider who does Roleplays (even if there is no nudity involved it’s still Escorting). As soon as any paid Online/Realtime session is over, you go back to being vanilla. Out of site, out of mind. Your boyfriends are vanilla as well and are not in any way, shape, or form submissive. A Domme that does not make.
i talk to Real Dommes constantly about this, and they all say the same thing: they have their own sources of income that do not involve subs/slaves paying them, they have no need for that. They Dominate subs/slaves because they enjoy it, not to make money off it.
1. cearalynch Post authorFebruary 26, 2012 at 8:44 pm
  
  Re: You are not a real Domme
  
  I agree to an extent; Yes, this is a business. Yes, we are getting paid for online fetish services. Yes, this is a form of sex work. Yes, most of us don’t live the “lifestyle” (although you realize a majority of lifestylers still live a normal vanilla life outside the bedroom, right?)
  
  However, I don’t think that just because money is involved it somehow ceases to be an act of dominance or BDSM. Sex is still sex even if you pay for it. Whether or not were “real dommes,” well, that’s subjective. Personally I don’t care so much about being “real” as I do being “good at.”
2. Anonymous March 3, 2012 at 6:19 pm
  
  Re: You are not a real Domme
  
  As a submissive who has served “real” dommes in person, I have to disagree that women like Princess Ceara, Princess Lyne or the other wonderful online women are not dommes. I serve Goddess Bratty Bunny and am completely devoted to her. I’ve never met her in person, but believe me, she has total control. She controls when I cum, what I think about when I do and when she contacts me with instructions I do them immediately because I am under her control. When you think about it, controlling someone when they’re right there with you is easy. When you can do it from 3000 miles away and without even meeting the person…well now that takes talent!
  1. evilthought2 March 7, 2012 at 4:03 am
    
    Re: You are not a real Domme
    
    No, they are not “real” domme. They are offering online sex service (which happens to be domme/sub fetish) for money. A real domme would be someone who does it in real life, not because they make money out of it, but because they enjoy it. This doesn’t apply to any of theses “dommes”.
    1. Anonymous April 25, 2012 at 6:36 pm
      
      Re: You are not a real Domme
      
      “A real domme would be someone who does it in real life, not because they make money out of it, but because they enjoy it.”
      
      You didn’t read the part about lala land , did you? The percentage of women who actually enjoy guys getting excited by their stinky feet for example, a very widespread fetish amongst submales, is negligible, if not non existent. Same is true for a lot of other popular fetishes.
      Most real life Dommes who are any good at what they do work for money as well. I have to agree with Ceara. If their incentive is money first, like Ceara admits here, but they do a proper job and even “play along” I don’t see the problem.
      Women who do this purely for their own fun don’t exist and the rare exceptions to that rule who do can make that much money they would be crazy to play with broke losers instead.
      Yes women with genuine BDSM feelings exist but this scene and this domme specializes and caters if you wish, no offense intended, in what are strictly male oriented fantasies
      
      Second and not mentioned in this whole real or fake domme discussion is the destructive nature of a lot of the fantasies played out to everyones satisfaction in this scene.
      There’s nothing wrong with dark fantasies or with indulging in them but they’re only fun because they are fantasies. Mist guys don’t want and couldn’t handle a “real domme” period. Those that do probably need mental health care.
      
      You pay a good Domme to create an illusion you enjoy that’s close to your fantasies and whether that’s off or online really doesn’t change much.
      
      Someone who behaves in real life like Ceara Lynch in videos and sessions would be a psychopath. You may think different when you are horny but you really don’t wanna.
    2. cearalynch Post authorMay 16, 2012 at 5:15 pm
      
      Re: You are not a real Domme
      
      Its interesting to me how often the claims people make about sex work so rarely apply to any other line of work. What’s the difference? Why is authenticity contingent upon a willingness to do it for free? If someone is really good at cooking, then decides they want to become a chef, does that person then cease to be a “real” cook?
Anonymous February 26, 2012 at 9:54 pm

none better – improves my life and yours to maximum

and when I go haywire
you and your honest indifference

snap me into line fast
Anonymous February 26, 2012 at 9:54 pm

none better – improves my life and yours to maximum

and when I go haywire
you and your honest indifference

snap me into line fast
Anonymous April 25, 2012 at 5:08 pm

ok

You’ve grown a lot.
I came here to disagree really but if you’re just gonna be honest, I respect that.

FUCK YOU

Trollin you used to be fun, now you’re all serious. WTF happened to you?

Luckily you’re still wrong on one thing though but you’ll figure it out all by yourself in time. And it’s really no big deal compared to the nonsense you used to post:D
Anonymous April 25, 2012 at 5:08 pm

ok

You’ve grown a lot.
I came here to disagree really but if you’re just gonna be honest, I respect that.

FUCK YOU

Trollin you used to be fun, now you’re all serious. WTF happened to you?

Luckily you’re still wrong on one thing though but you’ll figure it out all by yourself in time. And it’s really no big deal compared to the nonsense you used to post:D
ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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ballingebowu July 23, 2012 at 10:59 am

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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nravit July 23, 2012 at 12:50 pm

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Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
1. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
2. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
3. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
4. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
5. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
6. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
7. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
8. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
9. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
10. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
11. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
1. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
2. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
3. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
4. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
5. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
6. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
7. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
8. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
9. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
10. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
11. cearalynch Post authorDecember 12, 2012 at 7:35 pm
  
  Re: Enjoyment is everything.
  
  Well, if you’re *really* doing what makes her happy, then how on earth could you *not* find someone who enjoys it?
  
  My point here is that 99.9% of subs are not looking to meet whatever desires a domme may have. They’re looking for a domme who’s desires match their own. And they’re perfectly within their right to do so, but it doesn’t mean they’re going to have an easy time finding one.
  
  For every dominant woman looking for a submissive man to serve her and practice all her kinky fetishes on with no money involved there are THOUSANDS of kinky men waiting in line for her.
  
  For every generous man who loves to give money to women for the sake of doing so, there are THOUSANDS of women waiting in line to take it.
  
  But that dominant, kinky woman and that generous man are very few and far between. So the rest of us learn to meet in the middle. Men give a little of what women want (money), and women give a little of what men want (sexual/emotional gratification.) That’s how sex work works. It’s a fine and dandy trade, IMO. But let’s not be so delusional as to presume these are things either party would be doing if they weren’t getting what they really want out of it. And let’s not be so narrow minded that we think that just because our motives are different, that we aren’t *really* enjoying the exchange.
  
  Good luck on your search.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.
Anonymous December 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

Enjoyment is everything.

Princess Ceara,

This was very interesting to read. You mentioned in a comment that if a guy wants someone who enjoys the fetishes that they should “get a girlfriend and not a Domme.” I know there are some that believe that they are mutually exclusive, but I don’t believe they have to be. Even if you just add “Pro” before the “Domme” in your sentence, I’d disagree with that advice. Personally, I am looking for a girlfriend who is dominant, so I can serve her, as she wants. That might be doing her laundry, dishes, cooking for her, or whatever else she wants me to do. In the meantime, I’ve been a customer to several ProDommes. I’ve bought videos and picture sets, and yes, I do look for those that enjoy it. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do have a couple of my own fetishes, but my biggest fetish is doing what makes the other person happy, even if I don’t like doing it. Since the Domme’s enjoyment makes or breaks it for me, I think that it is totally reasonable for me to look for someone who does enjoy it as much as I do.

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Lynch 2.0

https://www.cearalynch.com

Service vs. Consumption

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