I returned from my trip to Australia a few days ago. Adjusting back to my “normal” life and trying to shake the post-travel blues. I decided the best way to do that would be to jump back into work and try to make up for the past several weeks of indulgence, so I spent a day taking calls and camming (skype username: ceara.lynch) Turned out to be a great 4-figure day.

I wrote down some notes about each call. Here’s what it looked like:

1. Had breakfast this morning with Mistress T and her boyfriend, then they left for a hippie music festival. Great visiting with them. Her boyfriend is a tantric sex specialist and gives “yoni massages.” T said he made her squirt for the first time and I was very intrigued. She told me if I want him to try it on me that she’d be cool with that. Tempting… I turned my lines of after they left and got a call from blacksissy. His real name was Oscar and he wanted to talk about the fact(?) that his girlfriend, Nicky, cheated on him with a guy named Will while they were both away on vacation. He wanted me to help him “accept it” so I made say things like “Natalie fucked Walter,” “Walter has a bigger dick that me” and “I want to suck Walter’s dick.” He mostly talked in a normal, sad voice but every time I said something he really liked he’d say “oh my god” in a whispery breath. When he finally came he said, “You’re amazing” and hung up. Call lasted 15 minutes.

1. Subpedro called me soon after. One of those obnoxious calls from a guy who says he “just wants to make me happy” and “giving me money is what’s most important,” yet I’ve never received a tribute from him ever. I told him if what he said were true, then he should just give me his money rather than taking up my time calling. He agreed (because he’s too submissive not to) but when I asked him why he doesn’t do that he just said, “I don’t know.” He then said something about buying my clips and I tried to explain to him the difference between buying things from me and giving me money because it makes me happy. He said “okay,” but did nothing to correct his actions or words.  I don’t know why this is such a big pet peeve of mine, I just wish guys would be honest when they want something in return for their money. I love my job, but I hate pretending its always some one sided relationship where their money is handed over to me for nothing, as though the time and effort I put into my videos and services is meaningless. Call lasted 6 minutes.

3. Made a turkey sandwich with vegemite I brought over from OZ and logged onto skype. Haven’t been on in weeks. Tons of messages and add requests. Lots of customers asking about cam sessions but little follow through except for one guy who bought 5 minutes for $50. He didn’t want to talk because he was too shy. Just wanted me to show off my “dirty” feet, call him a loser and talk about eating my shit. He came in 4 min and 12 seconds.

4. Jon paid $100 for 10 minutes of cam asking for, “Repeat after me humiliation, enslavement, paypig, manipulation and addiction.” He turned on his cam and I recognized him from a previous cam session. He must have changed his user name because our previous conversation on messenger did not appear. Im guessing he deleted it thinking he’d “never do this again.” I always find it a little awkward looking at a real person’s face when I do this and his was close up. I try to block it with the image of my cam and just focus on how I look. It’s so much harder to dehumanize someone when you see their facial expressions. This guy always looks so sad and uncomfortable and if I didn’t know any better I’d think he really didn’t like the treatment I give him. I would be terrible doing real time sessions for this reason. I tuned out his face and talked about how addicted he is to me and feigned unbreakable confidence. He came  in 6min 43 seconds.

5. Some guy named Ron started bugging me on skype about a custom video even after I told him to email it to me. I got annoyed so he offered to pay me for wasting my time. Cool! He paid $100. He later expressed interest in watching me ignore him for 5 min on cam so I had him send $50 more. As I was ignoring him, sissychrissy called and wanted to talk about being a sissy, cuckold and his “curiosity” about blackmail. I told him I wanted to dress him up like a whore and sell his ass to the men with the biggest cocks who messaged me on craigslist, then take lots of photos and own him forever. Call lasted 13 minutes. Rana sent $100 for 10 more ignoring minutes. He sent wrote messages that said,

“I feel humiliated by being here among my friends, and secretly doing this.
Men are meant to be ignored, and destructed.
Would you destruct me, as far as you may wish.
At that day, I drunk my piss as instructed in the video.
I wish I can be your fandom puppet.”

He asked me if I had any instructions for him so I told him to send another $100. He did. He asked for further instructions so I told him to send another $100. He stopped talking after that.

6. Dutchfoot boy contacted me for the first time since our session when I was in Australia. He wanted to get drunk and lick my sneakers again. He said he didn’t have much money but he managed to send $150. I sat on the couch with my feet propped up in my dirty runners while he waggled his tongue at the camera and took shots of gin. Easy money. I just sat back and played on my phone, pausing every once in a while to call him a loser or tell him to take another shot. He drank quite a bit in those 15 minutes. Asked if I had any converse shoes. I said I did and he paid another $100 to see them. Meanwhile a guy named Steve called my ignore line. Double pay! He listened in as dutchfootboy drank more gin, lapped and my converse  and stuck clothes pins all over his face. I took some pictures.

7. Unfortunately my phone died in the middle of the ignore call. Lasted 7 min. Steve messaged me to ask if he could call back, I told him to call back in 5 min. He sent another email asking if he could buy pictures of my ass, so I sent him a ppv email with 5 old webcam shots of my ass and charged him $50. He bought them and thanked me.

8. Bo paid $200 for 20 minutes of cam. He’s commissioned around 60 custom videos from me but this would be our first cam show. He wanted to tell me about his sexuality so I could give him my “honest opinion.” I’m never sure when guys ask me to be honest if they really want honesty or if they want me to say something mean in an honest sounding way. I decided to go with the former. He told me about his reoccurring fantasies involving cuckolding, black men, his sisters, etc. He talked about how the best sex he ever had was when he dressed up as a woman and got fucked by a man. He’s not really interested in fucking women, just being cuckolded by them, blah blah. I told him I didn’t have much of an opinion because I talk to guys like him all the time and I’m pretty used to it. I know it’s not normal relative to the general population, but it’s normal to me as a fetish girl. He seemed okay with my response. Then asked me more casual questions about my recent trip, how he used to write songs and his job as an investment banker.

9. Dutchfoot boy scraped together $90 to send to me. He’s wasted at this point. Same ole routine. Lick my feet, stick clothes pins on his face, drink. He’s going to have a headache in the morning.

10. Went into my bed to masturbate and take a nap. I feel like I’ve done nothing productive today, even though I’ve made over $1000. I still need to work out, but I feel jet lagged and out of sorts. Got a call from bballplaya23. He was the same guy who I was on the phone with in my HBO special where I was shopping at Macy’s at the same time. For some reason he’s a lot more boring of a person than I remember him when I was being recorded. Perhaps because I was better at talking to him while the cameras were on me. He said his wife was away and he had her panties and lingerie there to try on and jerk off in. He wasn’t into forced bi and it was like pulling teeth to get him to talk. He finally asked if he could cum and I told him he needed to beg me. He could only say, “please,” which, to me, is not begging, rather asking politely. I told him again to beg and he said he didn’t know how so I told him he couldn’t cum. I thought that would motivated him to try harder but he just stayed silent and eventually hung up. Call lasted 12 minutes.

11. Woke up an hour later and turned my lines back on. Immediately received an ignore call from greatest112233. Said nothing to him, not even my usual, “Hello idiot, you know you called my ignore line, right?”  Call lasted 10 minutes.

12. Hendrix aka my french loser called me. Normally he calls my ignore line for about an hour, which is great, but this time he wanted to talk. It’s insanely frustrating to talk to him because his english is terrible. He said he wanted to apologize for not wishing me a happy birthday. I told him he should send me $100 to make up for it. He agreed. Then he asked if I’d give him a task. I’m pretty burnt out at this point and I hate coming up with “tasks” unless they involve giving me money. So I told him to punch himself in the balls. He laughed. I guess that wasnt the task he was looking for. He kept pressing it. I told him I wasn’t his school teacher. Had to say it about 3x because because he couldn’t understand me. He asked if I’d humiliate him and I told him only if he completed his first two tasks. He said he’d call me back. Call lasted 10 min.

13. He called back a few minutes later, he sent me the $100. So I started humiliating him, telling him he’s a loser and no woman would ever want to fuck him. My patience wore thin as I kept having to repeat myself and didn’t understand a word he was saying. He asked if he could go, I said “please do.” Call lasted 6 minutes.

14. I should really take a break because just the phone ringing sets me off in a bad mood. Some might think that’s great for work but it’s just the opposite. Got a call from humburger, he told me he liked my homewrecking clips and last time we talked was when he was on vacation with his wife and I drained his balls so he was uninterested in sex with her anymore. It was hard to feign interest so I didn’t really try. I asked him why he called me and he said his “wifey” (ugh) was away and saw that I was on so he decided to call because I’m “like a rockstar” (ugh.) That didnt really answer my question so I asked him what he wanted to talk about. He hung up. No idea if my bad attitude put him off or if someone walked in the room. It was a relief either way. Call lasted 3 minutes. [Note: he left me a 1 star rating and said I was “lame” so there you go.]