Tag Archives: humiliation

All in a days work…

I returned from my trip to Australia a few days ago. Adjusting back to my “normal” life and trying to shake the post-travel blues. I decided the best way to do that would be to jump back into work and try to make up for the past several weeks of indulgence, so I spent a day taking calls and camming (skype username: ceara.lynch) Turned out to be a great 4-figure day.

I wrote down some notes about each call. Here’s what it looked like:

  1. Had breakfast this morning with Mistress T and her boyfriend, then they left for a hippie music festival. Great visiting with them. Her boyfriend is a tantric sex specialist and gives “yoni massages.” T said he made her squirt for the first time and I was very intrigued. She told me if I want him to try it on me that she’d be cool with that. Tempting… I turned my lines of after they left and got a call from blacksissy. His real name was Oscar and he wanted to talk about the fact(?) that his girlfriend, Nicky, cheated on him with a guy named Will while they were both away on vacation. He wanted me to help him “accept it” so I made say things like “Natalie fucked Walter,” “Walter has a bigger dick that me” and “I want to suck Walter’s dick.” He mostly talked in a normal, sad voice but every time I said something he really liked he’d say “oh my god” in a whispery breath. When he finally came he said, “You’re amazing” and hung up. Call lasted 15 minutes.
  1. Subpedro called me soon after. One of those obnoxious calls from a guy who says he “just wants to make me happy” and “giving me money is what’s most important,” yet I’ve never received a tribute from him ever. I told him if what he said were true, then he should just give me his money rather than taking up my time calling. He agreed (because he’s too submissive not to) but when I asked him why he doesn’t do that he just said, “I don’t know.” He then said something about buying my clips and I tried to explain to him the difference between buying things from me and giving me money because it makes me happy. He said “okay,” but did nothing to correct his actions or words.  I don’t know why this is such a big pet peeve of mine, I just wish guys would be honest when they want something in return for their money. I love my job, but I hate pretending its always some one sided relationship where their money is handed over to me for nothing, as though the time and effort I put into my videos and services is meaningless. Call lasted 6 minutes.



  1. Made a turkey sandwich with vegemite I brought over from OZ and logged onto skype. Haven’t been on in weeks. Tons of messages and add requests. Lots of customers asking about cam sessions but little follow through except for one guy who bought 5 minutes for $50. He didn’t want to talk because he was too shy. Just wanted me to show off my “dirty” feet, call him a loser and talk about eating my shit. He came in 4 min and 12 seconds.
  1. Jon paid $100 for 10 minutes of cam asking for, “Repeat after me humiliation, enslavement, paypig, manipulation and addiction.” He turned on his cam and I recognized him from a previous cam session. He must have changed his user name because our previous conversation on messenger did not appear. Im guessing he deleted it thinking he’d “never do this again.” I always find it a little awkward looking at a real person’s face when I do this and his was close up. I try to block it with the image of my cam and just focus on how I look. It’s so much harder to dehumanize someone when you see their facial expressions. This guy always looks so sad and uncomfortable and if I didn’t know any better I’d think he really didn’t like the treatment I give him. I would be terrible doing real time sessions for this reason. I tuned out his face and talked about how addicted he is to me and feigned unbreakable confidence. He came  in 6min 43 seconds.
  1. Some guy named Ron started bugging me on skype about a custom video even after I told him to email it to me. I got annoyed so he offered to pay me for wasting my time. Cool! He paid $100. He later expressed interest in watching me ignore him for 5 min on cam so I had him send $50 more. As I was ignoring him, sissychrissy called and wanted to talk about being a sissy, cuckold and his “curiosity” about blackmail. I told him I wanted to dress him up like a whore and sell his ass to the men with the biggest cocks who messaged me on craigslist, then take lots of photos and own him forever. Call lasted 13 minutes. Rana sent $100 for 10 more ignoring minutes. He sent wrote messages that said,

“I feel humiliated by being here among my friends, and secretly doing this.
Men are meant to be ignored, and destructed.
Would you destruct me, as far as you may wish.
At that day, I drunk my piss as instructed in the video.
I wish I can be your fandom puppet.”

He asked me if I had any instructions for him so I told him to send another $100. He did. He asked for further instructions so I told him to send another $100. He stopped talking after that.


  1. Dutchfoot boy contacted me for the first time since our session when I was in Australia. He wanted to get drunk and lick my sneakers again. He said he didn’t have much money but he managed to send $150. I sat on the couch with my feet propped up in my dirty runners while he waggled his tongue at the camera and took shots of gin. Easy money. I just sat back and played on my phone, pausing every once in a while to call him a loser or tell him to take another shot. He drank quite a bit in those 15 minutes. Asked if I had any converse shoes. I said I did and he paid another $100 to see them. Meanwhile a guy named Steve called my ignore line. Double pay! He listened in as dutchfootboy drank more gin, lapped and my converse  and stuck clothes pins all over his face. I took some pictures.
  1. Unfortunately my phone died in the middle of the ignore call. Lasted 7 min. Steve messaged me to ask if he could call back, I told him to call back in 5 min. He sent another email asking if he could buy pictures of my ass, so I sent him a ppv email with 5 old webcam shots of my ass and charged him $50. He bought them and thanked me.
  1. Bo paid $200 for 20 minutes of cam. He’s commissioned around 60 custom videos from me but this would be our first cam show. He wanted to tell me about his sexuality so I could give him my “honest opinion.” I’m never sure when guys ask me to be honest if they really want honesty or if they want me to say something mean in an honest sounding way. I decided to go with the former. He told me about his reoccurring fantasies involving cuckolding, black men, his sisters, etc. He talked about how the best sex he ever had was when he dressed up as a woman and got fucked by a man. He’s not really interested in fucking women, just being cuckolded by them, blah blah. I told him I didn’t have much of an opinion because I talk to guys like him all the time and I’m pretty used to it. I know it’s not normal relative to the general population, but it’s normal to me as a fetish girl. He seemed okay with my response. Then asked me more casual questions about my recent trip, how he used to write songs and his job as an investment banker.


  1. Dutchfoot boy scraped together $90 to send to me. He’s wasted at this point. Same ole routine. Lick my feet, stick clothes pins on his face, drink. He’s going to have a headache in the morning.
  1. Went into my bed to masturbate and take a nap. I feel like I’ve done nothing productive today, even though I’ve made over $1000. I still need to work out, but I feel jet lagged and out of sorts. Got a call from bballplaya23. He was the same guy who I was on the phone with in my HBO special where I was shopping at Macy’s at the same time. For some reason he’s a lot more boring of a person than I remember him when I was being recorded. Perhaps because I was better at talking to him while the cameras were on me. He said his wife was away and he had her panties and lingerie there to try on and jerk off in. He wasn’t into forced bi and it was like pulling teeth to get him to talk. He finally asked if he could cum and I told him he needed to beg me. He could only say, “please,” which, to me, is not begging, rather asking politely. I told him again to beg and he said he didn’t know how so I told him he couldn’t cum. I thought that would motivated him to try harder but he just stayed silent and eventually hung up. Call lasted 12 minutes.
  1. Woke up an hour later and turned my lines back on. Immediately received an ignore call from greatest112233. Said nothing to him, not even my usual, “Hello idiot, you know you called my ignore line, right?”  Call lasted 10 minutes.


  1. Hendrix aka my french loser called me. Normally he calls my ignore line for about an hour, which is great, but this time he wanted to talk. It’s insanely frustrating to talk to him because his english is terrible. He said he wanted to apologize for not wishing me a happy birthday. I told him he should send me $100 to make up for it. He agreed. Then he asked if I’d give him a task. I’m pretty burnt out at this point and I hate coming up with “tasks” unless they involve giving me money. So I told him to punch himself in the balls. He laughed. I guess that wasnt the task he was looking for. He kept pressing it. I told him I wasn’t his school teacher. Had to say it about 3x because because he couldn’t understand me. He asked if I’d humiliate him and I told him only if he completed his first two tasks. He said he’d call me back. Call lasted 10 min.
  1. He called back a few minutes later, he sent me the $100. So I started humiliating him, telling him he’s a loser and no woman would ever want to fuck him. My patience wore thin as I kept having to repeat myself and didn’t understand a word he was saying. He asked if he could go, I said “please do.” Call lasted 6 minutes.
  1. I should really take a break because just the phone ringing sets me off in a bad mood. Some might think that’s great for work but it’s just the opposite. Got a call from humburger, he told me he liked my homewrecking clips and last time we talked was when he was on vacation with his wife and I drained his balls so he was uninterested in sex with her anymore. It was hard to feign interest so I didn’t really try. I asked him why he called me and he said his “wifey” (ugh) was away and saw that I was on so he decided to call because I’m “like a rockstar” (ugh.) That didnt really answer my question so I asked him what he wanted to talk about. He hung up. No idea if my bad attitude put him off or if someone walked in the room. It was a relief either way. Call lasted 3 minutes. [Note: he left me a 1 star rating and said I was “lame” so there you go.]



His email:

I caught you on the Love + Radio podcast the other day and found you to be insightful and intelligent. Very refreshing.

I don’t mean to tell you your business, but I would be a bit careful as to how you treat some of your clients. I know it’s just for fun and a way to make a living, but some of the people who seek you need help. Professional help. And a humilatrix might get them off, but it also might just dig them deeper into their hole.

The vast majority of your clients are probably just horny and find you attractive and fun, but their are indeed troubled souls out there. And I know you don’t intend to make them more troubled. So please be careful. And stay hot.

My Response:

How do you propose I do that?

It would be easy to suggest my job is unethical if seeking out my services was purely a symptom of mental instability. But it isn’t. As you acknowledged, most of my clients are just horny and find me fun. Healthy people have fetishes, even ones related to deep humiliation. What people enjoy sexually does not give you any kind of predictive inference about who they are as a person.

However, given that there are a certain number of people in the general population that are mentally ill, it then follows that a certain percentage of my clients are mentally ill as well and, yes, perhaps my services are not beneficial to them given their current condition.

How am I to distinguish this sort of client from the rest? The only information they are giving me is what makes their dick hard.

What is my responsibility? At what point should override a grown man’s personal choices because I have a better understanding of what’s best for him? Should I run a psychological screening test to ensure each client is in the right state of mind to purchase my services? Request a letter from their doctor?

I do not want to harm anyone, but when someone tells me to “be careful” with no practical tools or advice as to how, all they are doing is instilling feelings of guilt and paranoia, suggesting I have an important yet unattainable moral obligation.

Many of my clients eroticize unethical behavior and personal destruction. They want me to behave like a sadist: to hurt them, fuck them over, leave them broke, destroy their life and not care about them in the slightest.

This could blur the lines of fantasy and reality until one realizes my clients have the power to end the fantasy at any point by turning off their computer. I do not chase them. I never make first contact or follow up. Every interaction with me begins with their initial approach, is contingent upon their payment, and ends when they stop sending money.


Meet Camille

Every once in a while, a sub comes along who takes his desire for public humiliation to a new level. While other “men” who share this fetish can do nothing more that share dull, faceless pictures of themselves wearing a g-string, this extreme sub relishes in an ever-increasing number of eyes running across every inch of his body. His excitement is contingent upon his identity being revealed and his secrets exposed. His thirst for shame cannot be satiated.

Ladies and gentleman, meet Camille.

This is not the first time I’ve exposed him nor am I the first woman to do it. To call Camille an “attention whore” would be an understatement. He has paid thousands of dollars to have pictures and videos of himself dressed like a fruitcake and engaging in gay sex spread across the internet time and time again. He has a history of “pretending to be straight” by dating poor unsuspecting women who have no idea that he was stuffing his mouth with cock every second their back was turned. Of course he loves playing with fire by giving me their contact info as well.


I felt it was time to give Camille exactly what he deserves: a thorough exposure video. One that includes all his pictures, a cam show where I humiliate him ruthlessly, and some footage of him doing what he does best: taking big black cock in his mouth and ass with my name written all over him.

Here’s a taste:

Pathetic isn’t he? See the full video here


Love + Radio

A couple weeks ago I had the pleasure of being interviewed by one of my favorite podcasts: Love + Radio. The host, Nick, is currently residing outside the states so we conducted the interview over Skype and it was recorded in my basement by a peer of his in the podcast circuit.


I’m very excited to be a part of this. Love + Radio is a story-based podcast that I have been listening to regularly for the past year. We recorded just under 3 hours of audio, which will be edited down to about 30 minutes and paired with music to tell my story about working in the fetish world.

Nick has asked me to record some of my niteflirt phone conversations to use in the final piece. If you would like to be a part of this, you can access my special listing for it here:


I have reduced my usual rate down to $1.99/min to entice more customers to call. I will ask for consent to record the conversation at the beginning. If you do not wish to be recorded, you will be asked to call one of my normal listings.

I will be recording phone calls through this line Fri-Sun Feb. 20th-22nd. This podcast will be available to the public on iTunes. So if a little public humiliation is your thing, this is a pretty fantastic opportunity for you. Let your freak flag fly.

You’re welcome.


We don’t choose what we like.

Last week I received this email from a guy, we’ll call him Phil.

I’m so desperately horny and my head is all mushy. What would you ask for cam ASAP? I’ll pay it. My dick is hard and my wallet is open.

Phil has contacted me here and there for a few years now. He likes to eat his own cum and masturbate in ridiculous ways. He once sent me a video of himself fucking a jelly donut and another in which he lit a birthday candle in his urethra and let the wax drip down the shaft. Great guy. On this day Phil was requesting a 20-minute humiliating blackmail session involving TeamViewer (a program where I can access his desktop via my computer.) I hate TeamViewer and was not actively camming when I got his email, which meant if I decided to indulge him I’d have to stop what I was doing, put on make up, dress sexy and get in the mood. So, I charged him accordingly: $500. He promptly paid.

The moment I turned on my cam he offered his TeamViewer login credentials without hesitation or coaxing. I logged in and opened up his desktop. The first thing I saw was an open browser containing several tabs; each containing a different woman’s instagram page. He told me one was his ex girlfriend, another was a hot chick he knew in college, and the other was a friend he liked.

My mission was clear: to facilitate his orgasm by fabricating the thrilling scenario of being exposed to these women for the semen-slurping pastry fucker that he is. I made fun of him for giving up this information so easily, mocked his inadequacies and pretended as though I was drafting up an email to send to each of them right there, spilling every dirty secret I had against him.

In reality, I have no interest in contacting these women. They didn’t agree to participate in his jerk-off games and to drag them into it would be a violation. Furthermore, I know that the moment Phil cums the last thing he’ll want is exactly what he’s begging and paying me to do now. That’s the irony of so many sexual fantasies: that in which we fear or disgusts us the most is exactly what sets shooting into sexual climax. But unlike most fantasies, Phil’s desires potentially have real life consequences beyond the simple shame of sexual deviance. So my job is twofold: to make him believe I am going to ruin him without actually doing it. The sense of “realness” is essential.

Midway through the session Phil loses his erection and sighs in distress. He tells me he doesn’t really want me to expose him and that it’s just a fantasy.

Of course I know that. But these fantasies are tricky, especially when the client gives you real ammunition. I’m forced to juggle with two polarizing emotions and it’s not always predictable which one will come up and at what time. I tried splitting the difference as best I could: assuring him that I haven’t done anything, but in a mocking way that lets him know I think he’s a giant pussy and probably gay for losing his erection around me. He then tries to change the subject in an abrupt, random sort of way by talking about podcasts and how I look like Aubrey Plaza. I guess in attempt to take his mind off the situation, I don’t know. Eventually his time runs up and I turn the cam off.

A few minutes later he messages me again and offers $100 to “finish up.” I accept, he pays, and I turn on the cam again. By this time he’s managed to get himself hard again, but the cycle continues: I play the part he wants, but he quickly loses his erection out of nervousness, admits defeat and the cam time runs up before he can get himself off. All in all $600 well spent.

I attract a certain amount of criticism for accepting money from guys like Phil. I get accused of taking advantage of men despite the fact that I’m (ironically) a rather passive domme who doesn’t actively seek out or coerce anyone into doing anything. If you don’t want to give me money for any reason, I genuinely do not care: there are more than enough men who do. But I can’t deny that clearly some guys do struggle with their desires and have difficulty controlling them. Phil is probably one of those guys. Is it immoral of me to do business with him? If so, what course of action am I suppose to take to distinguish between customers who are genuinely going “too far” (as oppose to just the fantasy of going “too far”) and those who are grown men who can make their own decisions about what to do with their money and penis.

We don’t choose what we like. Whether it’s the gender we’re attracted to or the fetishes we acquire; our minds make it up without consulting us and without our permission. A great book that drives this point home is Perv by Jesse Bering. I highly recommend it. His thesis is that we shouldn’t be concerned as to whether our sexual proclivities are normal or natural and focus on whether or not they are actually harmful.

I don’t think fantasies are intrinsically harmful, including ones about being blackmailed and humiliated by women. Most of my customers do just fine buying videos centered around those fetishes and then going about their unaffected lives. Very few actually risk messing up their relationships with others, dabbling in sex-offender type (flasher) behavior, or spending beyond their means.What exactly separates these two types of customers is not clear to me, but I have my speculations:

Phil is fairly young and I suspect like with many of my younger (& more confused) clients, he thinks he has to get rid of his fetish to get rid of the harm that potentially accompanies it. But no amount of fighting, denying or ignoring it will make it go away. Like putting a lid on a boiling pot, it’ll eventually spill over and you’ll lose control of its contents. The best course of action is to take the lid off and attend to it periodically. Meaning, if you stop policing your thoughts and jerk off to them when you want to, you’re less likely to lose control over them.

Letting an attractive woman ruin your life in multiple ways is a great fantasy that I highly approve of. The best part is you need not make it a reality to enjoy it. Thoughts are just thoughts; it’s how we act on them that matters.


Be a cock star!

Ever since I first started identifying myself as female on the internet, men across the globe have been sending me unsolicited pictures of their penises. Despite the copious amounts of dick my eyes have had to endure, guys still seem to think exposing themselves to me is somehow novel or amusing. Guess what? It's not and never was. Time to rub those two brain cells together and get a little more creative.

I'm holding a contest to see why can send me the most presentable penis. And for once in your life; size doesn't matter!

I'll be personally selecting three of the best submissions and then conducting a poll to the masses.

Winner receives a free custom clip.

Only $3 to enter. Choose one of the options below to enter and receive contest details (kinkbomb preferred):


– OR –

– OR –

Email me to arrange another method: contact@cearalynch.com