Big update

My my what a busy week it's been. My latest fleshlight campaign is off to a very lovely and profitable start. Im sure its only a matter of time before all you jerk-offs know the silky silicone satisfaction that comes from blowing your spooge in fake genitalia. Although I think the company is a little apprehensive about promoting the glory that is Ceara Lynch. Hey, I get it.. They've built their business on the notion that it's cool and totally masculine to fuck a rubber pussy. Amazing what the power of marketing can do. Never the less, I expect all you drones to start pounding your puds in one of these and making me $$;

I've recently acquired a new slave. As in, a legit one that's in it for the long haul (well, we'll see.) That's very rare for me these days. Over the years I've developed an extremely short tolerance for subs and I've found I prefer dabbling with a wide variety of them that I can quickly exploit and dispose of, rather than spend all my time training a select few. Never the less, this project peaked my interest, so we'll see how it goes. I recently filmed his indoctrination video, which he bought at $250, so it's now available to the general public for $10. If you're curious about the kind of expectations I have for long term servitude, I suggest you check it out. 

And speaking of long term slaves, I should take this time to acknowledge the one who's been with me longest of all, as he's been bugging me about some kind of recognition lately. For years he's been rather skittish and uncomfortable about being mentioned here publicly, but lately his tiny testes has descended a bit so I think I should give him a shout out. Some of you may know him on twitter as @cearajunky. His name truly suites him. He is easily my top caller on niteflirt, top spender on kinkbomb, and his dedication to me has far surpassed any other sub I've come into contact with. He bought me the iPad2 when no one else could get one ($700+), paid for me and my man to goto burning man (+$700), and has gone on numerous spending binges this year paying thousands. Anytime I am out with my friends, or especially my boyfriend, I can always count on him to pick up the tab, with very little given in return. A toast to you, CJ! You are truly my most favorite pet.

In other news, Gordan is back. For those of you who remember, last year he paid me to make an exposure clip in which I displayed his most humiliating photos, including his full name, and begged me to generally fucked over his life. Well, I guess it would have fucked over his life….if he had one. But scum like this lives for this shit. So much so that he bought the clip over and over again until it topped the charts on kinkbomb just to expose himself that much further. Well, he's back at it again. And considering how many more customers and studios are on kinkbomb than there was a year ago, it'll cost him that much more to put this clip at #1 and at the same time, even more people will get to see what a true shit-pig he really is. 

Tessa

I just updated the Team Tease Members Site with a new member; Tessa. This stunning brunette has a very lady-like way about her. When we filmed her at fetishcon, she explained to Monique and I that she didn't like saying anything "dirty." ..Weird, right? Needless to say we weren't sure what to make of that, so we just let her do her thing. The result? Soft spoken seductive dominance without all the foul mouthed sailor-swearing that most of us on the team are known for. Tessa proves you don't need a brassy mouth to turn a man into a slave.

Check out her debut clip, "Tessa holds the key" exclusively on our members site, along with a dozen more high quality pictures.


Tessa holds the key
Tessa has always been more than just a girlfriend; she is truly a goddess. Which is why you were always puzzled as to why she ever started dating you. Today everything becomes perfectly clear. She never saw you as a lover, but merely another object for her to possess. Now you must be locked away into chastity if you want to keep her in your life. She dangles the key in front of your face, torturing you, and calmly explaining her future plans.

Miss Jasmine


Sexy times with Miss Jasmine (http://www.eurasionpersuasion.com.) We went out last night to Portland's most famous and trashiest strip club for some drinks and c-sections sporting strippers. Gotta love tuesday night at the titty bar! All the guys there were far more enthralled by us sultry vixens bundled in our heavy winter clothing than any of the numerous bare pussies dancing in their face. Who can blame them? Stripper johns are just financial slaves in training.

This afternoon I went by her hotel to shoot some clips, including yet another lip locking lezzie clip paid for by some sad man who was charged over 6x the normal rate for custom clips. CHA-CHING. Any other dommes out there wanna go gay for pay with me? I have minimal cold sores this time of year.

In other news, the "winner" of my fishnet bodysuit auction was so pathetic and unworthy he actually paid to have it relisted. Yes, you heard right my putrid pets, his inadequacy is your gain. Time for round two:

BID HERE!

That said, here's a fantastic request that found its way to my inbox this morning. Why can't the rest of you half-wits be this creative?

"Princess Ceara,

Please price me the following fine dining meal request: Princess Pissghetti; A dish to rival any made by the finest chefs.

Spaghetti boiled in princess lemonade tossed in a sinus sauce and topped with grated foot dust and freshly dropped princess plug. Served with Ceara bread. Such a delicious meal should make you the next food network star.

Recipe: In a black dress disperse princess lemonade on camera into a pot under your dress then bring contents to a boil. Add spaghetti and stir until all liquid is absorbed. Perform sinus cleansing and disperse waste into the pot with pissghetti then stir. Add fresh foot dust removed with pet egg on camera. Sell how delicious my special meal will be and how much more valuable it is then any meal made by top chefs. As a final touch again place pot under dress and remove princess plug dropping it in with any extra bonus princess juices into the pissghetti. Dump entire meal into a gallon sealed bag. For Ceara bread, on camera chew the bread until liquified then let it drop on top of pissghetti, add dirty crusty princess cotton panty napkin, seal and ship with DVD to hotel address to be sent later.

Discretion will be appreciated

J"

Rene Phoenix


I've been spending all morning working on the Team Tease members site. Its incredible the amount of content we have right now. So many new brats we've yet to even introduce, it's amazing. We could bombard you all at once with a surplus mean bitches ready to beat your ego to the ground, but we can't be held responsible for your heart condition. So here's just one for now. Which, believe me, is way more than you deserve.

Introducing the amazing Rene Phoenix! We filmed her at this years fetishcon and boy did she not disappoint. She's pint sized rocker-chick with a real foot fetish of her own. A lifestyler who genuinely loves tickling, bondage, and of course making fun of losers like you. She was a real pleasure to film and makes a fantastic addition to our team. Check out more of her on our members site:

Fishnet body suit auction

One of my most loyal ebanned sluts got so excited to see me posting auctions again that he splurged on my wishlist then begged me to post my used fishnets. Hell, why not? I'll even take it one step further and auction off my fishnet bodysuit. Now that he's all worked up and practically spooging his pants in anticipation, I really want to see someone else win this one. His misery is my joy. Click on the link below to bid and see more of these devestating photos. 

BID HERE!

Heres your stupid update

My my what a busy Summer it's been; I graduated college, bought a house, ran a marathon, and extracted far more money than any of you dweebs deserve to have. Is there anything I can't do? I mean, really. My members site continues to l lure in more and more cum hungry subs every day while team tease grows bigger and badder with each new smokin hot brat that joins. I am truly, the definition of unstoppable. 

I hit the phone lines today. Always nice to reconnect with you dweebs via niteflirt. Especially in pants as tight as these:


(don't wanna miss the next time my phone lines are on? Follow me on twitter @cearalynch)

Yowza! Needless to say my phone was ringing off the hook. I milked a sissy, several foot boys, and squeezed out a nice sum from the infamous @cearajunky. Not bad for a lazy day's work. Meanwhile the clip sales keep rolling in. God damn I love $.

In other news, I've been cleaning out my closet lately, which means lots of perverted treasures are up for bid for you degenerate freaks to fight over. I just put up my socks and shoes, and already the bids are rolling in. Dont act like you don't want to throw yours in too:

BID HERE!

That's all for now, bitches. Oh yeah, and JOIN MY SITE:

Look who stopped by

I was fortunate enough yesterday to spend some time with my favorite Canuck, Mistress T (http://www.mistresst.net.) Here she is looking like a million bucks in her everyday clothes:

We had a great time catching up, filming, and showing her around the city. This woman rocks! That means a lot coming from me, I hate pretty much everyone.

Right around the time we were shopping for clothes at my local sex shop, I recieved the following email:

"Hi Ceara,

I'll pay $300 for a 6 min making out video of you and Mistress T. Please ignore this email if you're not interested.

Thanks."


Gay for pay with Mistress T? Count me in. I can't seem to keep my tongue out of this woman's mouth.


Wish I could say she was staying longer so I could torture you with more stories of our endearing biflexible shinnanegans – but alas, she leaves today. You blubbering babies will just have to wait for our lip locking lezzie lovers clip to be released.

In other news, I've been playing around with my SLR's self timer and took some pictures just before filming my latest clip, "inapropriate uniform." Wanna see the full set? Join my members site:  http://www.cearalynch.com

While you're at it, buy the clip here:


http://www.clips4sale.com/16312

Inapropriate uniform

The most gorgeous student in your class has been playing with your mind. She comes to class one day in a very provocative version of the school uniform and you are forced to talk to her after class. Little do you know this young beauty knows just how to manipulate weak old men such as yourself. She teases you with her white cotton panties, full round ass and perfect tits. Before you know it your mind is spinning. You forget quickly about your wife and your career and all that matters is getting an eye-full of your gorgeous student. Looks like she has you right where she wants you.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm about to go have brunch with the filthiest woman alive before bidding her adieu.